letting go

How to get over your ex for good!

Taylor Swift and Harry Styles
Taylor Swift and Harry Styles

OMG my ex is such a loser! I'm such an idiot for going out with him/her! Urgh, I effing hate my ex! What did I see in that person, seriously?

Does the mere thought of your ex make you cringe, feel sick or just really, really annoyed? Most of us at one point or another have been through a break-up, and they are freaking tough. Weeks, months or even years later the hurt can stay with us. Late night stalking of your ex, or their new partner leads to even more feelings of resentment or anger, or any of the multitude of feelings you can feel after 2 am while thinking about the person that used to be your person.

Does any of this sound just a little bit familiar? Well, with the Full Moon upon us I thought I'd let you in on a little releasing-the-ex ritual that I've done (many times!) with great success! Huzzah! We're going to swap out that negative stuff you've been saying about your ex for something positive, in the process healing, clearing and making way for the new. Because let's face it, the best reason to get over your ex for good is because you want something better in your life right? Well let me tell you, one more "my ex boyfriend is such a dick" speech in front of a group of new cute guys down at the local pub isn't going to make that happen.

<3 What you will need: A pen, some paper, a box of matches/lighter, somewhere safe to burn stuff, a desire to move on with your life.

<3 Step 1: Choose an ex that's been bugging you. Someone you've been thinking about, someone you have unresolved issues with, or even a crush you can't quit.

<3 Step 2: Write this person a letter. But here's the catch - everything you write has to be positive. Tell them why you fell for them, talk about their good traits, thank them for teaching you about [whatever!], tell them you'll always remember that crazy trip to [that place!].

<3 Step 3: Finish your letter with a "Thanks for the lessons and the blessings". You can list all the lessons and blessings if you really want to. Now sometimes all you want to say is something like "thanks for making me realise how much of a dick you were", or "I've learned that men are total morons and I'm better off without them". That's no good! Try something like "thank you for helping me see this strength within myself", "thank you for showing me what I really want in a relationship". Keep it positive!

<3 Step 4: Sign it off with love and wish them luck, and try to mean it. Imagine you will actually never see or hear from this person again and they are deleting all their social media accounts. This is the last thing you will get to say to them. I like this way to end it:

"I wish you love, I wish you luck and I let you go".

Oh yeah, and put your name too!

<3 Step 5: Burn it! Let the Universe carry your letter off on the wind. Or bury it in the ground, shred and recycle, whatever you do, just make sure to get rid of it somehow.

<3 Step 6: Repeat for all the loves, lost loves, crushes and exes that have even just a little hold on you.

They will always be a part of your past, but your present and your future is yours. Make it amazing.

<3 Sending you loads of love, light and beautiful releasing vibes! <3

Vix

x

<3 Step 7: Have a sing-a-long!


PS - if you don't think you could ever be ready to do something like this with an ex that's OK, but you need to talk to someone about that. Get some therapy, have a full confidential tarot or angel reading to look deeply at what's really going on for you, or find another way to start working through it, but you gotta work through it. x